INNING ISN'T EVERYTHING DEPT.

BIOGENESIS EXODUS DEPT.

It was announced today that Alex Rodriguez will be suspended through the end of the 2014 baseball season due to his use of performance-enhancing drugs (and his reported cover-up of that P.E.D. use — which apparently didn’t go so well). While an appeal is inevitable, his cheating-filled legacy appears set — and if he somehow makes it to Cooperstown, we have a pretty good idea what his plaque will look like.

DON’T MESS WITH TAXES DEPT.

When Derek Jeter triumphantly battled the Rays pitching this weekend and smacked a crushing home run for his 3,000th career hit, he was greeted as a conquering hero by the entire Yankees team as he crossed home plate.
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