Red Bull recently announced that in addition to their original flavor, they’d soon be introducing cranberry, lime and blueberry versions. This is good news for anyone who’s barfed up a Red Bull and thought, “I’d sure love to taste some variety in my vomit!” With that spirit of diversity in mind, we’re proud to offer a sneak peak at even MORE Red Bull flavors coming out soon!
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This week, death row inmate Ronald Post made news when he claimed that at 480 pounds, he was too fat to be executed without it being a “torturous and lingering death.” Now don’t get us wrong — the last thing we’d ever want is for a convicted killer to suffer in any way. But it does raise some interesting points. How fat is too fat? Is our nation’s prison system in need of reform?
Turns out that what happens in Vegas doesn’t always stay in Vegas — as Prince Harry learned after pictures were leaked of him playing naked billiards in his Sin City hotel room over the weekend. Whoops! It’s still unclear what Harry was doing, or exactly who shared the pics — but if you know the Royal Family, then you know that this type of thing really isn’t that unusual.
When asked recently if victims of rape should be allowed to have an abortion, idiot Congressman Todd Akin (R-Missouri) said that such pregnancies are "really rare.” “If it’s a legitimate rape,” he added, “the female body has ways to try to shut that whole thing down.” The predictable political backlash followed and soon Democrats AND Republicans were re-evaluating his creepy campaign — saying it was time to shut that whole thi
Over the weekend Mitt Romney announced that his vice presidential running mate would be Paul Ryan, a U.S. Representative from Wisconsin’s 1st District. Not that much is known about Paul (especially if you’re not into reading newspapers or researching things). So aside from the fact that his last name is also a first name (crazy!), we weren’t sure what to expect from The Man Who Would Be Veep. Luckily, we stumbled across this…
The numbers are in, and — wait for it — July was the hottest month ever recorded in the United States! (We weren’t asking you to “wait for it” for dramatic reasons; we just needed to wipe our sweat-drenched foreheads and chug a two-liter bottle of Gatorade “Turquoise Permafrost”!) We did conduct an exhaustive study, however, and discovered the…
This week in Mars news, the NASA rover “Curiosity” (also the name of a new perfume for cats) successfully landed on the red planet. The mission, which has been in the works since 2004, cost about 2.5 billion dollars! While our sources tell us about a tenth of that money was spent getting all 18,800 NASA employees “Curiosity” windbreakers, the rest went to building the actual spacecraft.
This past weekend was the San Diego Comic-Con. And while there was plenty to see — there was even more to hear. So prick up your pointy blue Na’vi ears and listen for these…
Recently, it was revealed that Amtrak is a billion dollars in debt. A Billion! With a "B"! Do you have any idea how many tickets they'll have to punch just to get out of that hole? Where did the nation’s most bothersome method of transportation go wrong? Well, luckily for you we have some hunches about how Amtrak actually got itself into this financial train wreck.