Arnold Artist: Richard Williams
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The NFL’s replacement refs have been ultra-horrendous all season — and last night, when they botched the winning “touchdown” in the Seahawks-Packers game, they weren’t even that good! But no worries! The idiot NFL says the idiot refs got it right! Meanwhile, the league continues to lock out the real refs because the poor saps want a pension — which a league that makes 40 zillion dollars a year apparently can’t afford.
The Emmy Awards were last night! If you were smart, you skipped it since most TV is garbage (MAD has a TV show, for crying out loud!) — but we’re happy to recap the night’s events for you with….
This week, death row inmate Ronald Post made news when he claimed that at 480 pounds, he was too fat to be executed without it being a “torturous and lingering death.” Now don’t get us wrong — the last thing we’d ever want is for a convicted killer to suffer in any way. But it does raise some interesting points. How fat is too fat? Is our nation’s prison system in need of reform?
In a secretly recorded video, Republican candidate Mitt Romney tells a group of his fundraisers that he doesn’t worry about the 47% of Americans who support Barack Obama and who don’t take responsibility for their lives. To make matters worse, Romney has stolen his no-worry approach from another perennial presidential candidate — MAD’s own Alfred E. Neuman.
A lot can happen in a year. Or, as we learned from Occupy Wall Street, nothing can happen at all. Today marks the one-year anniversary of OWS and...that’s about all it marks. For all the excitement, the promise of change and the energized followers, there have been no lasting, positive effects (something Obama supporters are all too familiar with). Still, anniversaries are a time for reflection, and it got us thinking about…
For the past week, Chicago’s teachers have been on strike — which means that for the past week, Chicago’s students played hooky legally! Although the media have covered the talks between the teachers, the politicians and a tentative agreement, there’s been little talk about what the students were up to! And, to us, that’s the real story! Which is why we took everything we knew about Chicago (1: they have deep dish pizza, 2: it’s called “The Windy City”) and dug even deeper to find out…