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Why Did "The Scream" Sell for $119.9 Million?

THE LAST AUCTION HERO DEPT.

As we mentioned earlier, a version of Edvard Munch’s “The Scream” sold for $119.9 million — that’s the most ever paid for a work of art at auction! To give you an idea of just how much $119.9 million is: if you had 119 million $1 bills and stacked them one on top of the other…it would be a better use of time and money than whatever Michael Bay would do with the same amount of cash! Still — what makes this particular smear of pastel so special?

Reasons Why Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom Will Get a Divorce

SPLITTING UP WITH THE KARDASHIANS DEPT.

Rumors have been swirling that Lamar Odom and Khloe Kardashian’s marriage is in trouble and that, any day now, they’ll announce they’re getting a divorce! But that’s crazy talk — they’d never announce that! Not when they could do a special episode of their show and milk the news for all the money it’s worth! And when they do, here are the...

Occupy Wall Street's May Day Poster Revised

CAUSE AND DEFECTS DEPT.

Occupy Wall Street organizers had a full slate of protests planned for today, but there was only one problem — the phrase “OWS organizers” is a bit of an oxymoron. And after a few months of protestors putting aside their white-hot rage (because the weather got a little nippy), their vague, scattered demands just resulted in today’s vague, scattered protests. Oh well — at least they got to make a pretty poster!

Ways to Get the Most Out of "Take Your Child to Work Day"

SPARE THE JOB, SPOIL THE CHILD DEPT.

Today is one of America’s most beloved pseudo-holidays, right up there with Root Vegetable Awareness Week: “Take Your Child to Work Day.” In bringing your son or daughter to work today, you’re teaching them the importance of commitment, dedication, and putzing around on eBay. And as long as you’ve got the little monster in the office with you, you might as well make the best of it — and we’re here to help.

The Obama Dive Bar Girl — What Was She Saying?

A BLANK DEPOSIT DEPT.

By now you’ve seen this picture of “dive bar girl” Madalyn Starkey posing with the President. You know the face. You know the point. But you don’t know what she said! Or do you?!? (You’re so secretive, you little minx, you!) We wrote a few ourselves — click through and share your own in the comments section!  

Celebrity Fashion — MAD Asks, “Who Wore it Better?”

THE DOPPELGANGER’S ALL HERE DEPT.

Whenever two celebrities wear the same outfit, there’s always a stupid article about who looked better in it. So we decided we want in on that action! After all, stupid articles are pretty much our bread and butter! Join the democratic process — cast your votes in the comment section!

When Other Notorious Characters Change Their Names Like Ron Artest

NBA-HOLE DEPT.

Last year, NBA thug Ron Artest changed his name to Metta World Peace in a heroic attempt to put his ugly and violent past behind him. It worked really well — at least until this past weekend, when “Metta World Peace” almost murdered James Harden with an elbow to the head. But why dwell on the negative? The important thing is that he changed his name to improve himself. We hope that others will follow his fine example and change their names as well.

The Strange Similarities Between Roger Clemens and John Edwards

CHEATS DON'T FAIL ME NOW! DEPT.

Two high profile trials are currently underway. One involves former Yankee pitcher Roger Clemens and his alleged lies to Congress about using steroids. The other involves former Senator and presidential candidate John Edwards and his use of campaign funds to hide an affair and love child. Two men. Two very different professions. And yet one can’t help but notice…

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