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Governor Chris Christie's Role at the Republican National Convention

GOV MAKES THE WORLD GO ‘ROUND DEPT.

New Jersey Governor Chris Christie will be giving the keynote speech at the Republican National Convention today — provided Hurricane Isaac doesn’t destroy the state first. (No worries — Rep. Todd Akin insists that a state can “shut things down” in the event of a “legitimate storm.”) Christie is considered a charismatic and entertaining speaker, so it’s hoped that he’ll energize and unite the party before Romney officially gets the nomination.

Todd Akin’s Stupid Rape Comment

RAPE-NUTS DEPT.

When asked recently if victims of rape should be allowed to have an abortion, idiot Congressman Todd Akin (R-Missouri) said that such pregnancies are "really rare.” “If it’s a legitimate rape,” he added, “the female body has ways to try to shut that whole thing down.” The predictable political backlash followed and soon Democrats AND Republicans were re-evaluating his creepy campaign — saying it was time to shut that whole thi

MAD #517 On Sale Now!

VIEW TO A SHILL DEPT.

MAD #517 is now available everywhere magazines are sold! This devlish issue adds fuel to the 2012 election fire as Barack Obama and Mitt Romney's presidential campaigns begin to heat up! It also features our Avengers parody by Dick DeBartolo and Tom RichmondPlanet Tad, Spy vs. Spy, The MAD Strip Club, Al Jaffee's Fold-in, and "A MAD Look at the Zoo" by Sergio Aragonés!

Information about Paul Ryan Now Being Spread by Democrats

LEGENDS OF THE PAUL DEPT.

Over the weekend Mitt Romney announced that his vice presidential running mate would be Paul Ryan, a U.S. Representative from Wisconsin’s 1st District. Not that much is known about Paul (especially if you’re not into reading newspapers or researching things). So aside from the fact that his last name is also a first name (crazy!), we weren’t sure what to expect from The Man Who Would Be Veep. Luckily, we stumbled across this…

MAD Exclusive: The Prayer Mitt Romney Left in Israel's Wailing Wall

MITTSHUGGAH DEPT.

Recently presumptive presidential nominee Mitt Romney made a holy pilgrimage to Jerusalem, where, just like any other divinely-inspired traveler, he was immediately showered with over a million dollars in campaign donations. Romney even visited the Wailing Wall — world-renowned for its cracks packed with the written prayers of visitors. Always respectful of local customs (and the opportunity to sway impressionable Jewish-American voters), Mitt stuffed in a prayer of his own. The Idiotical has an exclusive look at what Romney wrote on his slip of paper. Don’t believe us?

Emerging Details From North Korea Leader Kim Jong Un’s Recent Wedding

UN-TRUE LOVE DEPT.

Today it was announced that recently-appointed North Korean leader Kim Jong Un has entered the bonds of holy matrimony. Not much is known about the wife, Ri Sol-Ju, besides the fact that she has a thing for round, frowning despots. Although North Korea is a notoriously secretive country, details of the wedding spectacular still seem to be leaking through. Maybe Kim’s drunk uncle Frank accidentally went on a rant to the press. Maybe the wedding cake had a delicious, wire-tap center.

What is Mitt Romney Hiding in His Tax Returns?

MANY CRAPPY RETURNS DEPT.

There are lots of things politicians try to hide when running for office: ideological flip- flopping, past drug use, a proclivity for Miley Cyrus tunes. But that’s just the tip of the iceberg! Presidential candidate Willard “Mitt” Romney also recently tried to shield his precious tax returns, only allowing those from 2010 and 2011 to be seen by prying eyes. What’s there to hide, Mitt? Off-shore accounts? Dubious campaign contributions? A couple of drunken Walmart purchases? Just spill it already!

Obamacare Stands: Music to Liberals’ Ears

FULL COURT MESS DEPT.

The Supreme Court upheld Obamacare today — but NOT along the usual 5-4 split as “experts” predicted. The usual “swing vote,” Justice Kennedy, agreed with reliable right-wing gasbags Scalia, Thomas and Alito. But Chief Justice Roberts punk’d his conservative colleagues by voting with reliable left-wing gasbags Kagan, Kennedy, Sotomayor and Ginsburg.

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