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Dr. Drew’s Upsetting New Book

ADDICTION AND SUBTRACTION DEPT.

When Mindy McCready died over the weekend, she became the fifth patient from Celebrity Rehab to commit suicide. It also put the show’s host and creator, Dr. Drew, under scrutiny. Personally, we don’t trust any doctor who uses their first name as their last one (We’re looking at you, Dr. Phil!). And while we can’t say they should throw the book at Dr. Drew for his years of exploiting celebrity addiction, we thought we’d at least throw this book at him.

The Grammys’ List of Banned Body Parts — What’s Real and What’s Not?

NO NUDES IS GOOD NUDES DEPT.

Yesterday, a memo from CBS Standards and Practices was leaked to the public. In it, the network advised performers on this Sunday’s Grammys that certain wardrobe choices would be...unacceptable. They then went into detail, using the most awkward and prudish terms possible, what body parts performers should not show.

A MAD Tribute to the Original Batmobile

CLASSIC MAD DEPT.

The original 1966 Batmobile used in the Adam West television series sold at auction recently for a whopping $4.6 million — very good news for the current owner of Burgess Meredith’s penguin-shaped submarine. We pay tribute to the sale with the cover and first page of our Batman spoof from MAD #105.

Al Roker’s Upsetting New Book

THE SHART IS A LONELY HUNTER DEPT.

In a recent Dateline interview about his gastric bypass surgery, Al Roker admitted that in 2002, as he was getting used to the procedure’s aftereffects, he attempted to fart but wound up...let’s say...welcoming a brown front to the southern region. Then he threw his underwear in the garbage and went Al-Roker fresco.

The Elmo Puppeteer Sex Scandal, Set to Music

ELMO MONEY, ELMO PROBLEMS DEPT.

Hey, kids, let’s do this by the numbers: 1) Sheldon Stephens, a 23-year-old man declares that when he was 16, he had sex with Kevin Clash, the voice and Muppeteer of Sesame Street's Elmo. 2) Stephens later recants his story and says they had sex when he was over 18. 3) We find out he recanted his story only after he received $125,000 from Clash. 4) Stephens then recanted his recant and says his original claim is true! Phew, that’s a lot of numbers!

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