JUICETICE IS BLIND DEPT.
O.J. Simpson is currently arguing before a judge that he should be freed from jail because his lawyer botched his 2008 trial for armed robbery and kidnapping. (Poor guy — he can’t get away with anything!) His new lawyers will present 19 reasons why the Juice should be let loose — and we managed to get our hands on a few!
Casey Anthony is said to be planning to use a number of disguises and aliases after she’s released from prison on Sunday. Some ideas for her consideration...
• Call up Casey Anthony, see if she has any tips
• De-Friend Andy Pettitte
• Stockpile clean urine (just in case)
• Check nads, see if they still look like two Craisins
• Fling a bat at Mike Piazza, just for old times' sake
• Tell wife he’s going to the store, then go see Larry Crowne instead (because he’s a huge effin' liar!)
• Take comfort in the fact that, when he goes to prison, he already knows he looks good in a striped uniform
Artist: Sam Sisco
