Other Misconceptions Reinforced in the Mary J. Blige Burger King Commercial

WRAP MUSIC DEPT.

A controversy has erupted over the new Burger King ad featuring Mary J. Blige. Critics say it plays to the stereotype that African Americans like chicken. After careful review of the ad, we’ve discovered that the chicken stereotype is the least of the commercial’s problems.

Mega Millions Jackpot Odds

LOTTERY WILL GET YOU NOWHERE DEPT.

Tonight, millions of Americans will gather around their TVs for the Mega Millions Jackpot lottery drawing. The first prize is more than a whopping half-billion dollars!!! OK, it’s nice to dream, but the chances of you actually winning that prize are pretty long — something along the lines of 176 million to one. But as insurmountable as those odds may seem, other things  — but not all — have even longer odds.

Kony 2012 Poster Updated Post-Meltdown

CLEARLY WE SEE YOU'RE NUTS DEPT.

The good news is that acclaimed Kony 2012 director Jason Russell has followed up his smash online documentary with another video that’s already gone viral! The bad news is that the video is cell phone footage of him stark naked on a street corner, slapping the pavement and ranting about the devil. How long before Joseph Kony and his cronies flood the Internet with this poster?

Kony 2012 "Culturemakers" Respond!

A POKE IN THE REPLIES DEPT.

With over 100 million pageviews and counting, Kony 2012 — a half-hour long call for action against Ugandan war criminal Joseph Kony — has become the biggest thing to hit the Web since Rebecca Black reminded us that Saturday follows Friday. As part of its campaign, Invisible Children, the group behind the video, is pressuring 20 superstar “culturemakers” to speak out against Kony. Most of the 20 have stayed unusually silent on the red-hot issue — until now.

Rush Limbaugh Honored for Calling Woman a Slut

TOO PIG FOR HIS BRITCHES DEPT.

Recently Rush Limbaugh bravely called a Georgetown law student testifying before Congress a “slut” who “wants all the sex in the world whenever she wants it, all the time, no consequences.” He then went on to say that if women wanted him to pay for their birth control, he wanted something in return — videos of all these women having sex posted on the internet.

The Least-Funded Kickstarter Campaigns Ever

Recently, cartoonist Rich Burlew raised a mind-melting $1.2 million to produce a print version of The Order of the Stick, his role-playing themed webcomic. How did Burlew do it? Through a nifty online quasi-Ponzi begfest known as Kickstarter. But for every Order of the Stick success story, there are countless failures.

Overheard on Line to Buy the New Nike Foamposite “Galaxy” Sneakers

The sneaker-freak world is abuzz with news of this Friday’s release of Nike’s limited-edition Foamposite “Galaxy” shoes — footwear so starry purple, so glow-in-the-dark, and so comically overpriced that people are already camping out for a chance at their own $220 pair. And with the long wait ahead, they’ve got plenty of time to chatter.

Archie Marries Jughead, Prop 8 Be Damned

Yesterday, when a California appeals court struck down Proposition 8 — the state’s voter-approved ban on same sex marriage — anti-gay forces went ballistic, vowing to continue their fight to support “traditional marriage” Why can’t these knuckle-dragging troglodytes see the future that’s inevitably coming? After all, we did — way back in 2010, with an issue of Archie that foresaw the way things will eventually be — in California and beyond.

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