WE THE PAPAL DEPT.
HOLY SEEING IS BELIEVING DEPT.
Pope Benedict XVI made his retirement official yesterday with a farewell address to the faithful at St. Peter’s Square — but with a crowd of thousands in attendance, there was much more to be heard than Benedict’s monotone Latinate mumbling!
As anyone who has ever left a job will tell you, there are always lots of loose ends to be tied up before walking out the door. And, good Lord, it’s no different with Pope Benedict XVI, who will resign his papacy on Thursday.
It's been reported that Pope Benedict XVI will be resigning from his post due to "advanced age". We can't help but wonder if the Pontiff's been feeling pressure to step down ever since we named him as one of 2010's 20 dumbest people of the year.
Today, Pope Benedict XVI announced that he will be stepping down on February 28th. That means that after only 8 years in office, the job is open once more! (And in this economy, any job opening is something to get excited about) Still, we have to wonder if any of the candidates who were passed over the last time will be reconsidered for the chance to wear the giant pointy hat.
After reportedly assaulting Frank Ocean, Chris Brown posted a picture on Instagram of Jesus on the cross, with the message “Painting the way I feel today.” Awww, poor fella. Heavy is the head that wears the thorny crown! Still, we got to thinking, maybe we’re being too hard on Chris—especially if he IS the second coming! Which got us thinking about…
Recently presumptive presidential nominee Mitt Romney made a holy pilgrimage to Jerusalem, where, just like any other divinely-inspired traveler, he was immediately showered with over a million dollars in campaign donations. Romney even visited the Wailing Wall — world-renowned for its cracks packed with the written prayers of visitors. Always respectful of local customs (and the opportunity to sway impressionable Jewish-American voters), Mitt stuffed in a prayer of his own. The Idiotical has an exclusive look at what Romney wrote on his slip of paper. Don’t believe us?
Recently, The Pope’s butler was arrested on charges that he’d stolen secret documents! This is huge news! The Pope has a freakin’ butler! (That must be a VERY fancy gent!) You might be wondering — are the secrets he leaked actually that embarrassing? Is the Pope Catholic?!?!