Khloe Kardashian: The Terminated

THE EX-FACTOR DEPT.

Sad news today (well, sad for one person — for the rest of us, it’s actually pretty positive) — Khloe Kardashian Odom will not be returning next season to co-host X-Factor. There was no reason given, but it’s either because she wanted to spend more time with her family, or because she’s a talentless, unappealing cipher who was so terrible at her simple job that she made Mario Lopez look like a bottomless well of genius magnetism. Oh well — TV didn’t work out, but there’s always the big screen!

The Grammys’ List of Banned Body Parts — What’s Real and What’s Not?

NO NUDES IS GOOD NUDES DEPT.

Yesterday, a memo from CBS Standards and Practices was leaked to the public. In it, the network advised performers on this Sunday’s Grammys that certain wardrobe choices would be...unacceptable. They then went into detail, using the most awkward and prudish terms possible, what body parts performers should not show.

The Startling Similarities and Differences Between Chris Brown and Jesus Christ

THE PASSION OF THE CHRIS DEPT.

After reportedly assaulting Frank Ocean, Chris Brown posted a picture on Instagram of Jesus on the cross, with the message “Painting the way I feel today.” Awww, poor fella. Heavy is the head that wears the thorny crown! Still, we got to thinking, maybe we’re being too hard on Chris—especially if he IS the second coming! Which got us thinking about…

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