BODY BLOW VS. WADE DEPT.
LIGHT MAKES RIGHT DEPT.
THE MORE THE MARRY-ER DEPT.
Today, the Supreme Court ruled 5-4 that the Defense of Marriage of Act (DOMA) was unconstitutional — meaning that same-sex couples would receive the same federal benefits as other married couples. It’s a great day for equality, a great day for tolerance, and a terrible day for homosexuals with commitment issues. All in all, though, SCOTUS made a bold move — and it’s time to sing their praises.
JUICETICE IS BLIND DEPT.
O.J. Simpson is currently arguing before a judge that he should be freed from jail because his lawyer botched his 2008 trial for armed robbery and kidnapping. (Poor guy — he can’t get away with anything!) His new lawyers will present 19 reasons why the Juice should be let loose — and we managed to get our hands on a few!