The MADropolitan Museum of Art's Newest Acquisition: The Texter
RODIN TO PERDITION DEPT.

RODIN TO PERDITION DEPT.

THE BOOTH OF A NATION DEPT.
Yesterday, President Obama met with Governor Chris Christie to tour parts of the Jersey Shore that were ravaged by Hurricane Sandy. It was a rare display of both bipartisanship and unbridled bromance. We’re happy to report that not only was a splendid time had by all — it was also captured on film!

YUCK & COVER DEPT.
Some people think that the MAD editorial staff just throws whatever idiotic thing it can come up with on its covers, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. Sometimes, we have two idiotic ideas to choose from — and it’s now up to you, dear reader, to help us pick one! Here are today’s terrible ideas: one featuring the increasingly terrifying Amanda Bynes, the other, the always-tasteful Liberace. Leave your choice — and your pithy commentary — in the comments section.

BAD TO THE DRONE DEPT.
President Obama is scaling back the use of drones to kill terrorists and foreign enemies. Which is really a shame. Drones are destructive, extremely violent, and one of the laziest ways to destroy something. They’re just so American! Besides, the way Obama was mysteriously meting out a swift brand justice — it reminded us of someone else…

SELLING YOUR CONSOLE TO THE DEVIL DEPT.
Microsoft announced yesterday that they’d be releasing the first new Xbox console in eight years! The so-called “all in one” system, the Xbox One, will let gamers record live TV, play Blu-ray HD discs and even make calls on Skype. But it’s also getting people mad, since old games won’t work on it, and sharing games will mean paying an additional price. But let’s not rush to judgment until we take a long, unbiased look at the system. And in that spirit, let’s examine these MAD-researched…

iRS DEPT.
Apple is known for being amazing innovators in the field of electronics — but apparently they’re also ingeniously inventive when it comes to avoiding paying taxes! It was recently revealed that the company established an elaborate system of shell companies in various countries that let them avoid paying TENS OF BILLIONS of dollars in taxes! Stiffing Uncle Sam? There’s an app for that!

TIME FLIES WHEN YOU’RE MAKING FUN DEPT.

APPALL-INCLUSIVE DEPT.

SPLATTER UP DEPT.
Fresh off its record $58.4 million sale at Christie’s last night, Jackson Pollock’s “No. 19, 1948” is suddenly at the center of a growing controversy. After a closer inspection revealed a significant flaw, the buyer’s representatives are demanding a full refund — and we can’t really blame them.
