Reasons Why The L.A. Lakers Didn’t Rehire Phil Jackson

COACH INFESTATION DEPT.

After starting the season 1-4, the L.A. Lakers dumped their coach, Mike Brown, and interviewed — who else? — Phil Jackson for the job. With more NBA championship rings than he has fingers, Jackson was the clear favorite. But things didn’t quite work out and no one is quite sure why — except us!

NBA Jerseys We’ll Soon Be Seeing

NBA-HOLES DEPT.

Although the final decision won’t be made until 2013-2014, it’s looking like the NBA is going to start putting corporate logos on team jerseys. Who knows — with this new revenue stream, maybe the league can finally pay LeBron a proper salary (The man has a family to feed, dammit)! On the downside, though, once you start messing with sponsors, things can easily get out of hand.

Similarities and Differences Between LeBron James and Michael Jordan

AIR APPARENT DEPT.

Ever since he started playing, LeBron James has been compared to Michael Jordan. But there was one big difference between the two players: Jordan had actually won a freakin’ championship! But after the Miami Heat’s victory last night, LeBron’s hands are ring-free no more! It turns out, however, that that is just the tip of the iceberg! When comparing these two players, the parallels and divergences are as nuanced and intriguing as the plotline to one of MJ’s Hanes commercials.  

The Further Adventures of Obama Head-Touch Boy

RUBBED HEAD OF STATE DEPT.

The New York Times today published an article about 5-year-old Jacob Philadelphia, who, on a visit to the Oval Office in 2009, asked President Obama if he could feel his hair (a question that will definitely never be asked if Mitt Romney wins in November). A photographer captured the heartwarming moment, and the photo has hung in the White House ever sinc

Reasons Why Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom Will Get a Divorce

SPLITTING UP WITH THE KARDASHIANS DEPT.

Rumors have been swirling that Lamar Odom and Khloe Kardashian’s marriage is in trouble and that, any day now, they’ll announce they’re getting a divorce! But that’s crazy talk — they’d never announce that! Not when they could do a special episode of their show and milk the news for all the money it’s worth! And when they do, here are the...

Signs You’re Suffering from March Madness

CLASSIC MAD DEPT.

It starts with 64...then there’s 32...then 16...then 8...until it’s finally down to just four survivors! Some new reality show? Perhaps! But we’re talking about America’s inexplicable obsession with the college basketball tournament! How about you? Are you addicted to hardwood? Maybe you'll recognize the symptoms in this classic piece by John Caldwell from MAD #403

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