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The MADropolitan Museum of Art's Newest Acquisition: The Texter
RODIN TO PERDITION DEPT.

Obama and Christie: Jersey Shore BFFs
THE BOOTH OF A NATION DEPT.
Yesterday, President Obama met with Governor Chris Christie to tour parts of the Jersey Shore that were ravaged by Hurricane Sandy. It was a rare display of both bipartisanship and unbridled bromance. We’re happy to report that not only was a splendid time had by all — it was also captured on film!

Michele Bachmann Quits Congress: MAD Will Miss Her!
CLASSIC MAD DEPT.
Whoever said, “Dying is easy, comedy is hard” died before Michele Bachmann ran for public office. The four-term, factually-challenged Congresswoman from Minnesota was a gift to comedy writers everywhere — her gaffes providing daily fodder for pundits, late-night comedians and yes, even MAD. Yesterday, Mrs. Bachmann announced that she would not seek another term in Congress. Her departure from the political scene will once again make comedy hard. Good bye, Mrs. Bachmann. And thanks.
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From MAD #513, February 2012
Writers: Frank Santopadre and Genevieve Sterbenz
Covers We’re Contemplating: Amanda Bynes vs. Liberace
YUCK & COVER DEPT.
Some people think that the MAD editorial staff just throws whatever idiotic thing it can come up with on its covers, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. Sometimes, we have two idiotic ideas to choose from — and it’s now up to you, dear reader, to help us pick one! Here are today’s terrible ideas: one featuring the increasingly terrifying Amanda Bynes, the other, the always-tasteful Liberace. Leave your choice — and your pithy commentary — in the comments section.

Barack Obama: The Drone Ranger
BAD TO THE DRONE DEPT.
President Obama is scaling back the use of drones to kill terrorists and foreign enemies. Which is really a shame. Drones are destructive, extremely violent, and one of the laziest ways to destroy something. They’re just so American! Besides, the way Obama was mysteriously meting out a swift brand justice — it reminded us of someone else…

Exciting Features of the New Xbox One
SELLING YOUR CONSOLE TO THE DEVIL DEPT.
Microsoft announced yesterday that they’d be releasing the first new Xbox console in eight years! The so-called “all in one” system, the Xbox One, will let gamers record live TV, play Blu-ray HD discs and even make calls on Skype. But it’s also getting people mad, since old games won’t work on it, and sharing games will mean paying an additional price. But let’s not rush to judgment until we take a long, unbiased look at the system. And in that spirit, let’s examine these MAD-researched…

Idiot Spotlight: Tom Bunk Takes on Lance Armstrong
SKETCHY CHARACTERS DEPT.
Today's "Usual Gang of Idiots Spotlight" is on artist Tom Bunk! Below is his illustration for "Other Admissions Made by Lance Armstrong," written by Jeff Kruse.

To read the full piece, pick up MAD #521, on sale now at newsstands AND on your iPad! But don't stop there: subscribe to MAD today! Get the print edition here and the iPad version here!



